Saturday, September 23, 2006

Prosecco

I really do have the best boyfriend in the world.

Last night, Scientist arrived home from work on his bike, sweaty and full of sweetness, and presented me with a bottle of Prosecco, one of my favorite alcoholic drinks in the world. He had, apparently, ridden half way across Iowa City to buy for me on my birthday (thus the sweatiness). Isn't that sweet?


We ended up having a pretty low key night-- we watched most of The Godfather II and ate some really kick ass Spinach Alfredo and Tomato pizza, along with drinking some Prosecco (unfortunatley it wasn't as awesome as the stuff Brian and I had in Italy). It was nice.

Tonight we'll have dinner at this great Spanish tapas place, Devotay, and then meet some people at a downtown bar. I need to make sure I take it easy on the Sangria so I can make for the long haul. I'll turn 30 at 12:31am Sunday morning. Oy.

More reflections on aging later.

Thursday, September 21, 2006

The beginning of Birthday weekend!

As of 10:50am this morning my birthday weekend extravaganza has begun. I finished a Biostatistics test (which was not very easy, let me tell you) this morning--the end of which marked the beginning of the aforementioned birthday weekend--as well as a Epidemiology test on Monday (which I got a B on, God damn it).

Maybe this weekend I'll have a chance to write more, although between eating, going to see The Last Kiss, snuggling, drinking, puking in the Ped Mall, and shouting "I'm THIRTY, BITCHES!" at every turn, I may not have time. We'll see.

I hope you all have a great weekend!

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

Thiiiiirrrty

I will be thirty years old on Sunday, September 24th, 2006. More about this and how I'm handling it later.

You may carry on with your day now.

Robin

P.S. Why hasn't anyone been commmenting lately? I feel neglected (sniff, sniff).

Thursday, September 14, 2006

Almost, But Not Quite

I really need to get on the ball about updating this blog more often.

It's been a good, although frustrating week. Classes are going well. I got a hundred percent on my Biostatistics homework! (HA! So much for me not being so great at math, huh?) My Epidemiology class is still interesting, although I'm a little nervous about a test I have coming up in a week; I just want to get it over with, really. That was the good part.

The frustrating part came at the end of the week. As I mentioned before, about 6 weeks back I applied for a job at Planned Parenthood as a clinic assistant. I had been really hyped up and excited about this job: it payed well, gave me some solid experience in public health, included a full medical/dental/vision plan, and seemed to be in a very woman friendly environment (which would be a totally new experience for me, considering my experiences both in corporate retail/coffeeshops and misogyny riddled Eastern Europe).

Unfortunately, I didn't get that job. My Scientist and figured it went to a nursing student or, possibly, someone with more counseling or medical experience. I sort of scratched my head and figured I chalk this one up to another missed opportunity.

That is, until Wednesday when my mom got a call on her answering machine from the nice HR lady I talked to in PP Headquarters in Des Moines. She was inquiring as to whether or not I was still looking for work.

I ended up arranging an appointment with S (I'll call her S for privacy's sake), the PP manager in Iowa City for Friday. I was a little nervous about the meeting; I could take the job but only if they could work around my class schedule. Now, normally, this wouldn't be a problem, but as a part of this new job they wanted me to drive to the Quad Cities every Tuesday and help out the clinic there. I, of course, have class on Tuesdays, so I wasn't sure how well this would work out.

S was super nice. She started out by telling me she felt as though she owed me an explanation regarding why I didn't get the job I had applied for at PP over a month ago. Get this: she said I was OVERQUALIFIED. Can you believe that shit?! She said she had wanted to give me the job, but given my experience (I did some HIV/AIDS outreach work as a Peace Corps volunteer in Ukraine) she felt that I was overqualified and was afraid I'd leave soon after being hired.

Needless to say, we went around and around about how much I wanted to work there and how great she thought I was, and preceeded to basically give each other one warm fuzzy after another. Then I showed her my schedule.....which was when all the warm fuzzies ended.

S basically told me that the only way I wouldn't get this position would be if she couldn't make my schedule work with the schedule of when she needed people. She also told me no less than three times that she really really wanted me to work there, and that if it didn't work out that it would ONLY be because of my availability (specifically my availability on Tuesdays).

Anyway, the nice lady from Des Moines PP HQ called that afternoon and told me (via my answering machine) that, in fact, things weren't going to work out. S couldn't arrange all the employees' schedules to work, so I was out of luck. Thus, I missed another opportunity to make $4 more per hour, earn full medical, dental and vision benefits and work in a job that is, in fact, in my field.

Needless to say, I'm a little disappointed. I'm trying to adopt this shucks-that's-too-bad attitude, but each near miss on the money and job front makes it a lot harder. God. Damn. It.

Sunday, September 03, 2006

EMDR

It is never ceases to amaze me how fast this blog can wind up out-of-date. You'd think I was horrendously busy or something.

Actually, I am pretty busy between classes, homework, work, working out and cuddling with my Scientist (yes, I know that's icky sweet). It's all I can do to keep up with Project Runway and call my mother every week.

Things have been going pretty well, I guess, except I'm starting to get ridiculously worried about money--if I don't finish up my PTSD treatment and get this lawsuit FINALLY settled I'm not going to be able to pay for tuition and will be totally screwed financially. Why, oh, why couldn't I have been born into money? Or have a gift for business and a degree from a highly ranked business school?

Speaking of my PTSD treatment, things have been going very well with my therapist, Dr. L. I don't think I've actually described the treatment I've been undergoing thus far: it's called 'Eye Movement Desensitization Reprocessing' or EMDR. Essentially it involves "reprocessing" whatever traumatic event it is that's causing you anxiety or depression.

EMDR is a fairly revolutionary treatment: the patient sits with his/her eyes closed with headphones on, holding this little disks in each hand. The therapist basically guides him or her through re-living the event while the patient listens to alternating beeps in each ear and feels the little disks vibrate in each hand. I know it sounds totally wacky (that's what I thought when I first heard about it), but the logic behind the treatment is sound (pardon the pun). The idea is that when you undergo something highly traumatic that causes you to avoid things in your life associated with the event or causes some sort of psychological stress, the centers in your brain that control emotion and logic get "clogged up". The beeping in your ears and the vibrating disks in your hands are basically used to stimulate both sides of your brain while you're reprocessing it, hopefully with the goal of removing any and all sense of fear that's associated with the aforementioned event.

How does this treatment relate to me and my PTSD? Good question. I get really anxious when I drive, especially when I'm in any situation that involves driving somewhere where I can't always see the driver or when there's any sort of blind spot whatsoever, like say pulling out of Scientist's parking lot. Additionally, I get super nervous when I'm driving anywhere near anyone with white hair, or when someone rushes up behind me, or when I'm close to a big van/car/truck/semi....If you think about how often you encounter any of these situations over the course of a day, you can see I'm constantly winding up in situations that cause me to freak out (sometimes literally).

This, of course, doesn't include my daymares, nightmares, my overwhelming anger at the guy who hit me or how shitty some of my "friends" were after the accident. Needless to say, we're trying to cover a lot of ground and get me back to a place where I'm not pissed off or afraid of something a lot of the time.